To Infinity and Beyond...

Month

August 2010

Day 23- Something you crave for a lot

Haven’t been posting much lately, probably due to summer and whatnot.

Hmm, something I crave…..

Food wise I’d have to say pasta. I’m a carboholic. Pasta, bread, you name it, I love it.

But knowing Tumblr, this isn’t supposed to be about food, it’s supposed to be about something deep and emotional.

I guess I really crave being alone. I’d rather spend an entire day by myself then go out with a big group of people. I love my friends to death and would do for them, don’t get me wrong.  But there’s something about being alone…..I have no idea what it is. Oh well, maybe I’ll figure it out one day.

Aug 30, 2010
#food #cravings
Aug 28, 20102 notes
#dance #ballet
Day 22- What makes you different from everyone else

I strive to be different. I hate conformity.

And yet, I strive to fit in. But don’t we all? We want to stand out, but not in a way that makes people dislike/fear/ avoid us. We want to blend in, but not be forgotten amongst the crowd. Its a constant battle we face inside ourselves, even if sometimes we won’t admit it.

I enjoy being different. And physically, at least at my school I do it pretty well. I’m pale as can be and can’t tan to save my life. Most people I know obsess over being tan and criticize me about my skin, but I really don’t care anymore. I embrace it. I love being pale. It makes me stand out. I guess another thing that makes me different is my hair. Most people I know straighten theirs religously, but I can’t really do that with mine, its too culry/wavy/annoying to do it everyday. So I just let it be.

Physically I may be different but honestly I don’t know how “different” I am in any other way. I’m just me, and really thats all I know how to be. Go ahead and dislike me for it. I know who my true friends are,

Aug 27, 2010
Day 21- Someone you judged on a first impression

Hahah, I love this question.

I judged one of my best friends the first time I heard about her. We both liked the same guy at the time, and well, it didn’t go over so well. We really didn’t talk and avoided each other because of it.

After everything faded between us and the guy we actually started to become really good friends. We even started talking about the guy, and how we couldn’t believe we had liked him at some point.

Now she is one of my best friends and I wouldn’t want it any other way. I’m glad that we were able to become friends because of it.

Just goes to show I guess that you can’t judge a book by its cover. Total cliche but extremly true.

Aug 26, 2010
#first impression
Day 20- Someone you drifted away from

When I was in fourth grade, after I made the transition to private school, I made a really good friend.

She was everything I wasn’t, and everything I had hoped to be. She was smart, bubbly, loving, and well, a little crazy. After we met, we became really good friends really fast. Some of our other friends became jealous of our instant connection (and the fact that I took her along on vacation one weekend). We remained pretty good friends, even after she switched schools. We’d shop, IM untill late and do everything good friends do. We never really got back to being the best friends we used to be, but it didn’t matter.

Read More →

Aug 25, 2010
#old friends
Apologies

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You were my first friend at Tri. We’ve shared secrets, homes, food. I haven’t talked to you for real in months. I miss the you before you met him. I’m sorry that we can’t be friends the way we were before him. I’m sorry I can’t be the accepting friend that you always were to me.

You want to be just like me. You want to be a teenager, stay up late, have a cell phone. I’m your idol. But I’m the worst person to pick for that role. I want you to grow up kind, strong, loving, respectful, and selfless. Basically everything I’m not. Don’t be anything like me. I’m sorry that you have to listen to me cry over my mother. I’m sorry I can’t be strong for you. I’m sorry that while she tries to hurt me, she indirectly hurts you too. I’m sorry I’m not the sister you deserve.

Read More →

Aug 24, 2010
#apologies #I'm sorry
Day 19- Nicknames you have; why do you have them
  • Tay - Short n’ sweet and to the point. Everyone calls me this at least once.
  • TayTay - Only used by a few people, mainly my closet friends.
  • TadPole - Oh God, I used to HATE getting called this. My two best friends Katy and Izzy gave me this in 4th grade because my initials are T.A.D. Bleh.
  • T Dog - Haha my friend Sarah calls me this when shes mad or trying to get my attention.
  • TaterTot - I honestly can’t remember how it originated but I get called it when my friends make fun of me.

Nothing super interesting……I have a boring name.

Aug 23, 2010
“Life isn’t about waiting for the storm to pass, its about learning to dance in the rain” —

Aug 22, 2010
#dance #rain #life
Aug 22, 2010
Day 17- The person you miss the most

I miss who people used to be. I miss all the moments and the memories with them.

Ever since my friend started dating this guy almost a year ago, I’ve drifted from her more and more. I don’t regret doing that at all, because I don’t miss the person she is now, I miss the person she used to be. I’ve tried to get used to this new person she’s become, but to be honest, this one drives me insane. She’s turned into the type of person I hate.

She used to be my best friend. Now we don’t talk. I hear the things she says about me to my real best friends, and I get so mad. Does she not remember how things used to be? Does she not realize how hypocritical she is about some of the things she says?

I don’t understand it at all. But drifting away from her has made me realize who my true friends are.

So good riddance to you. Have a nice life.

Aug 22, 2010
#old friends #memories
Day 16- Someone that's not in your state/country

I have a few people who don’t live a all close to me, but love as if I see them everyday.

First is my cousin Gabrielle. When we were younger and she lived closer, our parents would dress us up in matching outfits, since we’re so close i age, they acted like we were twins. We grew apart as we got older, but after our great Grandpa passed away we became super close. I get to talk to everyday now, and I know I can talk to her about anything and she’ll be there for me and I know she feels the same about me. I love you Gingy<3

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Second is my Grandma and Aunt who live in Canada. I love them so much. They have always been there for me, only a phone call away. I don’t get to see them very often, but I’m so thankful I have them. My Grandma can make me laugh no matter what mood I’m in, and always has something nice to say about anything. I love you guys <3

Aug 22, 2010
Aug 18, 2010
#heart #beach
Day 15- Put your iPod on shuffle: First 10 songs that play

I’m doing two in one day because I havent been on in so long.

1.Holiday -Green Day

2. Your Love Is My Drug -Ke$ha (lil’ bit ashamed there..lol)

3. Walk Like An Egyptian -The Bangles (80s music FTW)

4. Rockstar -Nickelback

5. Shake It -Metro Station

6. See The Light -Green Day

7. Better Days -GooGoo Dolls

8. Breathe -Taylor Swift

9. Losing It -Nevershoutnever

10. 1985 -Bowling for Soup (hearing that song just made my night)

Aug 18, 2010
A picture of you and your family

Family to me has always been a very broad term, refering to many people. They’re are some people in my life who I don’t get to see or talk to anymore, but they will always be people I consider my family, who I love.

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me and my stepmommy <3

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my daddy and my half brother <3

I’d tried to find a pic of me and my Mom but I couldn’t find one.

Aug 18, 2010
#family
Day 12- Someone you hate/caused you a lot of pain

Given up on putting Spanish in my titles. Oh well :D

I’ve been sitting here for 15 minutes trying to think of what to write. I kept writing stuff and then erasing it.

I don’t like that this challenge thing has someone you hate and someone who caused you pain on the same day. I mean, I don’t hate everyone who has caused me pain. Who does? Then you would hate the whole world.

I don’t have a strong hate for anyone. Sure, some people annoy me, or are rude to me for no reason (you know who you are, and you have no life). I don’t know. Day 12 has made me mad.

Aug 13, 2010
Day 11 - tu hermano

For ten years, I was an only child. Most of my friends were jealous, and I never really understood why. They told me how much they hated fighting with thier sister, or when thier older brother ate all the cereal. I’d longed for a sibling as a young child. When I was ten, I got my wish

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My brother is 5 years old, and even though we are far apart in age, I love him to pieces. He teaches me something new everyday and I am so thankful I have him in my life. I’d do anything for him. He may be my half brother, but I love him all the same.

We share a room, but honestly I wouldn’t have it any other way. I don’t like sleeping in a room by myself, and having him there makes me feel so safe. Sure we fight sometimes, like any other brother and sister. If I go away for a few days or even a few hours, the look on his face when I come home is priceless. He loves me in a way that no one else does. He doesn’t judge me for things that I’ve done, or the way I look. He loves unconditionally, and I hope it’s something he does for the rest of his life.

Zach is a better person than I could ever hope to be. Everyday I watch him grow up a little bit more, see more of the man he is destined to be. I love him with all of my heart, and I always will.

Zach: I wish I was a teenager, just like you Honey.

Me: You say that now, by the time you’re my age you’ll want to be five again.

Zach: Uhh, no. If I was a teenager, I could stay up late and play with my Legos.

Me: If you were a teenager, you’d have to get a job.

Zach: (gives me a weird look) No, I wouldn’t get a job. I’d build with my legos for money.

Me: Okay, good luck with that kiddo.

Zach: Oh Honey, you’re so silly sometimes.

By the way, Honey is his nickname for me. No idea why, but I role with it.

Aug 12, 2010
#brothers
Aug 11, 2010
Day Diez- Songs you listen to when you are Happy, Sad, Bored, Hyped, Mad

I like literally all types of music. It just all basically depends on my mood. I won’t list every single song, because it would take forever, so I’l just do a few of my favorites.

Happy-

“Happy” Nevershoutnever (haha go figure)

“Poker Face” Lady Gaga

sometimes I’l listen to Ke$ha too.

Sad-

“Breathe” Taylor Swift

“Boston” Augustana

“Viva La Gloria!” Green Day

Hyped- Anything loud and fast or anything I can sing too. Generally I just hit shuffle and go crazy.

Mad-

“Brick by Boring Brick” Paramore

“Welcome to the Black Parade” My Chemical Romance

“Bigcitydreams” Nevershoutnever

I’l also usually put on Classical when I’m mad because it calms me down instantly, its like magic I swear.

Aug 8, 2010
#music #paramore #My Chemical Romance #Nevershoutnever
Day Nueve-

Something you’re proud of in the past few days.

Well two things mostly, ones kinda silly, the other is serious.

This week I decided to hang out with someone I usually don’t like to see very often. We were friends when we were younger, but sort of drifted away, and I would get irritated by her. At some point I decided that I was sick of her, and that we wouldn’t be friends anymore.

But, inspite of all of that, I accepted her invitation to her house for the night, not really expecting much. (Here I go, mentioning expectations again). I thought that it wouldn’t be a lot of fun, and that I would spend most of my time getting annoyed at her.

No way did I expect that I would have probably the best few days of my summer, or that I would become really close with someone I had wanted to drift away from.

I’m so happy I took the chance to become friends again, I missed her. Sure, she still annoys me, but I annoy her too. But isn’t that what all friends do, irritate the crap out of each other, but still love each other anyways? I’m so glad we’re good friends again Sarah<3 love you!

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My silly thing that I’m proud of is that I tried to go up the down escalator at the mall the other day. I’d never really attempted it before, but I was near the top so I thought it would go seemlessly. It didn’t of course, and I tripped and scrapped and bruised my legs. I couldn’t stop laughing, when most people kept asking me if I was okay. I’m glad that for once I did something on a whim, instead of taking 20 years to think about what I should do, only to miss my chance all together. Is this escalator adventure a sign for whats to come? Okay so maybe not, but who knows? Anything can happen.

Aug 7, 2010
Expectations

We all have them, in one form or another. People have them of us, we have them of people, of life, of ourselves. We expect our friends to be there for us, the sun to set each night, the moon to rise. Some are more reliable than others. But what happens when expectations aren’t met?

Disappointment. Arguably the crappiest thing ever.

I have so many expectations for sophomore year. So many that it scares me to think that most of them will end in disappointment. The easy thing to do would be to not expect anything good, but its not that easy. Everyone wants something good to happen in their lives. It can’t be helped, it’s human nature.

I’ve been let down more times then I can count in my life. but that only makes me hope and expect more.

Who knows…maybe this year will be the best yet. Maybe all my little hopes and expectations will come true, or at least some of them. I’m so scared to be let down again, like I was last year.

“Uncertainty and expectation are the joys of life. Security is an insipid thing.”- William Cowper

That’s all for my little rant now. Bed time!

-tay

Aug 7, 2010
#expectations
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